he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Randomize
