The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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