dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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