There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
