i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
