I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
