Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
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