i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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