Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I wish they made helmets for livers.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
