If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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