i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
