i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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