Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
