You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
