dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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