If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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