I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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