Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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