Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
