Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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