i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
That's how pantless uber rides happen
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
