i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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