Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I think my fart just growled at me.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
