they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
