i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
