Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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