He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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