Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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