i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
We were destined to go to rehab together
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
