WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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