I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
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