whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
should my penis look like a turkey
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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