I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Randomize
