I must be too annoying 4 u.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
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