I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
