her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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