I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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