Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
pray to the hookup gods
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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