I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
