it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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