At least make sure they are 18
Why
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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