ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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