Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Randomize