My friends, they love my intelligence
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize