HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
