she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize