Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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