Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize