thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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