So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize