Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
